About I love you!

     -I love you!

    - Love you too!

     It's the phrases that most of us would love to hear in a relationship. What we feel, what we trust, what we desire, we think it comes from the other partner. However, when in love, what we refuse to see it's that these words became something to be said with such an easiness as 1st grade math problems themselves. I'm not trying to vow the past, it had its terrible things too, but on the era of the great writers and painters, where the art was still an art, where you could see the sweat of a painter's forehead thru his painting, love was as well an art. Either described in poems, paintings or songs, saying the word love was something very touching and sensitive, because it was respected.

     Nowdays, I think saying I love you, became as something so easy to say, same as you could say, Can I have a cofee? Double sugar too! I'm not a martire, I'm not a saint, I'm not a scientist and I'm not here to impress. Maybe I don't know yet who I am but I definitely know who I'm not. And I'm not an uncounciouns person, not aware of her interior desires and feelings. When I hear I love you! it makes me tremble, not because I feel overwhelmed, but because I feel like asking: Double sugar too? I don't feel like fainting of  Love you too! Because the hard work of that painter's painting had been transformed into two lines of red on the right and two lines of black on the left, an ugly painting vowed and exposed into one of Paris most fine art galeries. But there is no art, there is no love.

     Many women feel affected by ex relationships, by ex partenrs. Nothing to judge, I'm on of them. It's realy hard to trust people, and when I look for sincerity and trust I look for the eyes of a dog. They somehow confort me. The eyes of a man, they somehow make me tremble...and not of joy. Out of my experinces and my friends experiences, being left and unloved makes you wonder if there is something wrong with you. You start to think it was your fault, if you could have acted differently, if this or that. 

     But in time, you come to realise you don't need someone to judge you, you don't need someone to say if you were good enough or not, you don't need someone to make you feel unworthy if you slept together too early, if you were calling too mucch, if you were reaching too much, if you were desiering too much and at the end of the day, you don't need someone to say I love you! More important, you must get to the point where you can say, I love the person that I am.

     And if we're still at this touching subject, why instead of saying I love you, you start saying I respect you! Don't tell me I love you!, tell me I respect you!